Moving On

Each time a major change occurs in our lives, whether it is a marriage, a death, a new job, a move to a different city, we have to reconstruct the pieces that make up our daily lives, like putting together a puzzle. After five months of being retired, I am still doing that.

The first thing I had to do was to disengage from my old routine: getting up at 6:00 AM, keeping the kitchen stocked with the ingredients to make my brown-bag lunch, putting out my wardrobe for the next day each night, and setting up the coffee maker before going to bed at 11:00. All of this was gone in the blink of an eye, as was driving to the office while listening to my favorite radio station, walking across the parking lot, turning on the computer to check my email, reading the daily company news, going for my noon walk, etc.

In place of that old, familiar routine, I began to add new things that I never had the time or energy to do before, things like making a healthy breakfast for myself each morning, working out at the gym three days a week, shopping for fresh food at the farmer’s market, going out to lunch with my husband. Errands are now spread throughout the week, instead of crammed into the week-end.

But after five months on this new, more relaxed routine, I felt like there was something missing. A big part of that was being a member of a community of people. Although I still keep in touch with my former co-workers, I no longer really “belong.” I missed having an independent existence that I could call my own. When I got into my car and drove to work each day, another part of my identity emerged, the part of my self that was out in the world “doing something” and using my expertise, energy and mind to solve problems, get things done, and be recognized for it. These are the things that I kept in mind as I pondered the various types of volunteer activities I could pursue.

The first volunteer position I have accepted in a local social services organization involves two afternoons a week at an office where the small permanent staff made me feel like part of the family immediately. Some of the duties will require me to “stretch” a little in developing my people and listening skills, which is one positive thing. More positive still is the fact that my incentive for being there is to help people in the community. Continuing to complete the puzzle of building my new routine will be an on-going process. Perhaps I will later want to add one or more different volunteer activities, or perhaps I will really click with this one and want to spend more hours here. By taking this first step into the world of community service, however, I feel like I truly have taken the final step in leaving my old life as a corporate employee and moving on.